Listening to my horse

Listening to my horse

I took Scottie on a trail ride today.  We started with our usual routine of grooming, then ground work.  I got on him in my ring/front pasture. We walked around a bit and then headed out for the trail.


I opted to take a well known favorite that would take about an hour with time to stop at the river.


After about 20 minutes he stopped.  Simply didn't move forward any more.  Now, he has done this before.  One time he actually cocked a leg. It was as if he was saying, hey, I just need a breather (and we were with a friend then.)  Being alone today, and he hasn't done much since my foot was broken all summer, I assumed it was a 'I really want my friends' kind of stop.  He did not try to turn, spin, or in any way attempt to head back. Those are all things a herd bound horse would do.  So, it did strike me as odd, but I was pretty sure that was the answer.  Onward I pushed, literally, and he gave nothing.  


Eventually we had a chat.  I explained to him that I would kick him if he wouldn't go and that I really did not want to do that.  So, I kicked.  And pushed.  And kicked.  Nothing.  So, I got down.  I figured I would walk him forward a bit, get back on, and once he realized that he had to move forward anyway, he'd be fine.


I found an appropriate sized log to stand on (he's 17.3h) and up I went.  Ok, here we go.  Nope.  He still wasn't moving.  While being hand walked he seemed fine.  Never stopped or even pulled or tugged on me.  Just willingly following me.  Hmmmm.....  I grabbed a stick and whacked him.  He moved about 3 steps and stopped.  I was stumped.  I was not going to haul with all my might on my sensitive friend.  I have a brain and know that is not a good idea.  So, I told him we'd just hang out there together for a while and think about this.  I told him I wanted to know what was going on and that I wanted to have fun with him.  We stood there for about 10 minutes.  Not once did he try to turn around.  All of a sudden a thought popped into my head. (This is typically how my intuition works.)  My thought sounded like Scottie and he was saying, " You said you wanted more warning  if something is wrong.  If you'd stop trying to make me move forward and pay attention and listen, you would know I am trying to tell you something. "


I took a deep breath, asked him to turn around, and we walked home.  Quietly.  It was not a 'yeah she's letting me go home' walk like Shadow would've done.  It was just Scottie walking.


For those of you reading this that do not know, about 1 1/2 years ago I was on a trail ride with Scottie and a friend when he suddenly, without any warning (or so it seemed) bucked and flung me into the air.  I was catapulted up and over, landing head first. Broke my ankle, which I am so grateful for because landing on my head scared the crap out of me.  After that we had many conversations about how and why this happened.  Turned out his back was very sore from a previous spill he took on a trail.  I asked him to make sure and tell me 'louder' next time he had a problem.  I asked him to make sure I understood so this never happened again.


I felt ashamed as we walked home.  Why did it take so long for me to figure out?  My first thoughts were of a negative nature.  That he was doing something wrong and I could not let him win by turning around.  I had tears in my eyes as I apologized to him.  I think at that moment he was feeling that humans are a bit slow.  I am sure there are many horsey folk who would say I did the wrong thing.  You know, I don't care.  I am safe.  He is too.  I'll get the chiropractor back out, and we'll go from there.  I'd rather be alive and wrong than dead or injured and right.

Stories from Scottie

The weather has been great and I'm really eager to go out more with Loretta.  She's got all these ponies keeping her busy now and we need some time to hit the trails.  So yesterday we headed out. I was a bit surprised that we only did about 10 minutes of playing before she brushed and tacked me up.  Anyway, we were headed out, same ole path.  Then up ahead I noticed something moving.  That's when everything changed.


We kept walking down the path, we were still close to home.  I soon realized that there was something VERY scary at a neighbor's house.  It was long, moving all around and making funny noises.  And it covered their whole driveway.  My first thought was to run.  But I heard Loretta telling me to relax and that it would be ok.  But as we got closer it got scarier.  The noise got louder and I really feared for our safety.  I made the executive decision to leave.  The easiest way out was to run up the hill I was next to.  That would give us some distance and a good opportunity to watch for an attack.  Loretta asked me really hard to stop.  I know I should listen to her, so I did stop, but really didn't want to.  If she's not going to protect us, then I have to!  I was trembling all over and thought I could hear her telling me to calm down and that it would be ok.  


It went something like this:


L:  calm down boy, it's ok. easy.
S:  wwwwhat?  did you say something?  do you see that THING over there?!
L:  yes Scottie, I see it.  But it's ok.  It's tape to keep cars out.  It can't move, it's not alive.
S:  But look!!! It IS  moving!  And it sounds like its crawling closer and closer to us!
L:  ssshhhhh boy, relax.  It really will be ok.  we're fine, see?  it's just blowing in the wind.
S:  But it's never been there before.  we pass here all the time.  and it's never, i say never been there before.
L:  The home owner just put it there.  Let's just walk on quietly by.
S:  I can't take it anymore.  I want to please you, but I have to make a decision and I'm choosing our lives!  Let's GO!


I couldn't hear anything Loretta said after that and she ended up getting down.  She asked me to walk down the hill which I did not want to do.  She then asked me to walk back and forth in front of that thing for like half an hour!  She must be crazy.  How can she not see that thing is terrifying?  And why isn't she scared of it?


Finally she brought me home.  I was sweating up a storm and real nervous.  I was so happy to be back at the barn with hay to munch on.  Home sweet home.

Talking to Scottie

I often hear my horses talk to me. At first, I thought it was my imagination. Then one day when my vet was out, she was talking as if she were my horse. I was surprised that she said exactly what I thought he was saying. We talked about it, and since I am pretty intuitive anyway, she said, sure, it's him. You are actually hearing him speak. (hence the blog title)

Since my fall I've been trying to talk to Scottie about it. I'd like to find out what the hell happened to cause him to buck like that. I know I've speculated many things, but, I'd like to hear from his point of view. But, it seems I've been sort of blocked when it comes to hearing him talk about this topic. I get nothing at all.

My vet is a chiropractor, (the same one that hears the horses) and she was out working on his neck the other day. The good news is, she did find soreness, if you can call that good news. I guess it is somewhat of a relief to think I finally found the big reason. Since his session with her, he just FEELS different. I don't mean to the touch. I mean his energy. He feels more calm, more relaxed. Which is a really good thing for Scottie. LOL I was standing next to him the other morning while he was munching on hay from his hay rack. I heard his neck popping just from the small motions he was making with his head. I'm thinking this is good. So I began to give him Reiki. You must know that he normally is a little stand offish when it comes to receiving Reiki. He usually turns away and I feel nothing at all, almost like it's not even flowing. Not this day. He seemed to melt into it. Like he really enjoyed it, and I felt quite a bit of flow coming form my hands.

I figured this would be a good opportunity to talk to him about this incident. So I calmly started talking to him about our ride that day, asking about the bucking. Almost immediately I heard him respond with, "You weren't listening. I tried telling you and you didn't hear me." Wow, I was a bit surprised. I'm thinking, where did THAT come from????? I tried to gather my thoughts and emotions, and simply responded with, "Ok, I'm really sorry. Next time there's a problem, can you please find another way to tell me? Even if you try and I'm not hearing it, you just CAN'T buck like that again. I promise I will be more aware."

Whew.

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Why is it hard for me to learn?

Seems I'm the only one that thinks there's a deeper lesson to learn here. Everyone still asks, and they all still think he was stung. One friend is scared for me now. And she doesn't know how I should 'fix' it. **Deep sigh**

It frustrates me to no end that I can't explain to them what is going on. And, even if I did, I guess they wouldn't understand. I don't think there is something to FIX at all. And it couldn't be anyway. Scottie can learn, and learn tools to help him cope. He's learned a LOT in the last 3 years, and made HUGE progress. But, I believe he is the way he is, because I am the way I am. And until I change, neither will he. It goes back to the horse being a mirror topic. So, since I am unorganized, unstructured, have not much discipline or consistency, then, it all shows up in him. I'll have to think more about that.

So, here's what I do know:

1. I had been doing groundwork only 5 or so minutes before riding-my preflight check.
2. The above has been going on for some time now. A long time.
3. I had introduced a new halter/bridle to Scottie the day I was thrown.
4. I know that when he is introduced to something new, he needs time to process. I KNOW THIS.
5. His allergies were really bad already and I had not noticed.


So, was he trying to tell me something? Yes. I believe he had been for a while, maybe a month or two. I was just too dense to notice. So, he figured, ok, she's not getting it, so here's a loud and clear message for her. Pay Attention!!

I have to put some structure back into my day so that I have quality time working on him EVERY day. Yes, even when I don't ride.